# Poetry

Mirage.

I may be the self
I’ll never be
I may be the self
You’ll never see
It seems like this side I’ve been living-
is a lie,
is a lie.

What are we
fool for love;
When what is said, a pure dust
When all we’ve done is lust, unjust
Yet to claim, we have loved enough?

What have I
again, forgotten
to doubt such
Compassion; the
unimaginable You?
To have lived
a life once loved
but to let go-
Damned, if I do.

Longing to heal
The wound unknown
Have I become a selfless being?
Yet to love, the self once torn
God is indeed, a gentle King.

What am I now
hoping
You’d see the self I’ve become;
believing
You’d be the self
I’d never seen;
For this side I’ve been keeping from myself-
is alive,
is alive.


r_L

This is it for now.

Rest Assured

* I'd like to thank Stella for your suggestion for the title of this one. Yes, it fits perfectly. And also to Bill and Allan, thank you very much for your thoughts. Very much appreciated :-) 

I believe in 

peace, 

even if it dies;

dreams, 

where my hope survives;

love, 

when all I have 

                            is

                                I.

I believe in 

gifts,

so you can be found;

music, 

where you're the sound;

presence,

when you

                  ’re 

                     around.

I believe in

chances,

where life is learnt;

nature,

that we’ve abandoned;

and God,

though He

                   is 

                      silent.

***

*so this will be my last post until God knows when. yes, i do have a life in case you aren't aware lol. just need to get a few things done. properly. anyways, i thank you for sticking around. just stay awesome, please :) 

r_L

Excuse me while I finish this slice.

I have become unstoppable the as of late. Good. This time, I’m back with some easy breezy, unseen/one-sided love kind of thing, in a pretty simple manner. Some lines are meant to be sappy… reflecting how infatuated a person can be. Well, this is not my first time writing this love/romance genre. I did write a few years back. You can see some here as you browse through the old previous posts. DO NOT feel free to have a look. The rest, which are more incomprehensible ones are in the private community. Yes, feel free to read them ;-)

Anyways, whatever written down here… it is not based on my experience. More like observation, so to speak. Kinda like being able to see the moment when a boy meets girl, a boy falls in love, and a boy breaks down… okay, okay, I made that one last up. But you get my gist. If anything, I’m the most inexperienced love expert. Contradicting? Writers are all that. Trust me ;-)

All feedbacks are welcome :-)

*Dear friends in love, this is for YOU*

All to Myself I Keep

If loving you

is ever so easy

I’ll tell you over and over

indefinitely-

…but this, to myself I keep.

But this, to myself I keep.

I seek not your attention, my sweet

It’s your spirit- keeps me alive indeed

Like a smile can make any day turn bright

Oh, why loving you feels so right.

Your tone is lazy,

exquisite;

Your words, they’re

hanging, on a teaspoon-

singing,

to no tune;

dancing,

on a moon.

like flowers

these feelings, wilt;

but it’s me

whom I find all weak.

If loving you

is enough for me;

I’ll watch you in silence

unknowingly.

Somehow to you, I cannot speak,

It’s true what they say-

“I just can’t breathe”

…so all to myself, I keep.

So all to myself, I keep.

For all the twist and bliss;

For all the butterflies in my sky;

I thank you, Love, for this-

You’re my secret joy, one of a kind.

If only you could see me now

perhaps, I’d have opened this stupid mouth;

If only I’d ever said just anything-

…but all to myself, I keep.

Still, all to myself, I keep.

r_L

Writing should never be this hard.

Hati itu Bumi; kadang-kadang cantik, kadang-kadang merisaukan!
barangkali seperti Langit- kadang-kadang lapang, kadang-kadang menyesakkan. Kau mungkin keras, puas- tapi masih kosong, sepi. atau mungkin, cukup lurus -tapi telus, berisi budi. Hati itu Satu; bukan dua. Kau tiada; atau semua. Hati yang indah mungkin cinta- namun pada siapa? Hati yang terikat pada kiblat- itulah Nikmat yang paling padat! Hai hati, kau mati sebelum manusia dimamah Bumi- cantik tapi tua, asli tapi plastik…kan aku dah kata, kau ini seperti Bumi?


Karut tetap karut. But I have to begin somewhere to start writing poetry again. Yes, it’s been a while it seems. And yet, I came up with this. Haha. I was never good at Malay writing to be honest. I wish I was a lot better. Not that I never tried… it’s just that every time I do, they all sound too good to be true. Too flowery, I suppose. Haha. But despite all that, I just need to get the right feeling to express better. No pun intended :-)

I’m not messed up. But these random thoughts just popped up in my head. Macam-macam interpretasi bila tengok gelagat orang. Kadang-kadang rasa letih dengan pemikiran sendiri. Haha. Dah lama tak fikir banyak. Seronok pula rasanya, bila sekali sekala berlaku. Teringat zaman yang bingung… semua benda nampak macam asing. Hmm. A beautiful memoir, it was :-) Anyway, I’m sure we all have our own minds that we choose to live in, don’t you think?

So dear writers out there. You know who you are. Keep on writing. Write something random. Be random. Tell us what you think. Or what you do not think. Talk to someone you least expect to talk to about things. Share a secret. Go ahead and be in love. Live the moment as it should be lived :-)

A poet without hysterics is rare.


kutumerah

Unpainted

you were once
the sky
shining through
my April sunrise
revealing spirits
once concealed
sifting twisted,
discarded memories.

lingering heat
taste of hibiscus tea
on your lips where

words mixed
in a warm soup, enticing;
letters of the alphabet
hang on a teaspoon-
screaming, in fervor
dancing, in desperation.

our love
once burst in April rain
now lost
without gravity-
unpainted in space,
only silencing
in pain, it seems.



r_L

Smell

You smell like
ethereal
resinous
floral
- a smog.

You’re a coincidence
a rustling wind
a smorgasbord of smells
an infectious disease
you’re all those-
forgotten swifts.

You smell a lot-
like my sweet
epiphany;
musky like musk
minty like peppermint
as I breathe you in
through my millions
olfactory cells-
…breathless.

r_L

LOST IN WAR

Look

Thousands of feet below you

Though they be livid and dead as nails

Men went to battle grim and glad

As heads of the characters hammer through daisies

Children, they hate you, broken and mad

Consider. One bullet in 10000 kills a man.

Ask. Was so much expenditure justified

On the death of one so young and so silly

Lying under the olive trees, O world? O death?

Look

upon myself

Indeed I have lost nothing

but all patriotic feeling

They’ve bought my tears and sought after my soul

Taken my pride that was once thick and bold

Have I found myself a life?

Yes- but why don’t I feel whole?

If ever I saw blessing in the atmosphere

Would you come breathe your life into me?

If ever I was found I would be happy

But now if now only.

red_lice

040206

PERMISSION TO LIVE

Her brown face sparkled with tears

Whose glow shall wake the sky

The stars shall bend their voices

And every stone shall cry.

And every stone shall cry,

And eyes like gold shall shine

Through the salty snow where

Hopes and fears sinking deep

Running red beneath her feet.

This is a damned inhuman sort of war

The pilots sit among the clouds, quite sure

About the values he is fighting for

He can’t hear beyond his veil of sound

Or see the people on the weary ground

Only knows of the people creep

Like ants- and who cares if ants laugh or weep?

His lust runs yet and is unsatisfied

Waiting for the precise split-second to order fire

Proud of the skill; whilst the guns roar

This is indeed, a damned unnatural sort of war.

Reeds whisper

here in the morning

The sky shall groan and darken

And every stone shall cry.

And every stone shall cry,

For stony hearts of men:

God’s blood upon the spearhead

God’s love refused again.

But now as at the ending

The low is lifted high

The stars shall bend their voices

And every stone shall cry.

And every stone shall cry,

In praises of the child

By who’s decent among us

The worlds are reconciled.

And as for her alone

Through meeting her bouquet of death

She’s still alive; feels her body sweet

The grains beyond age, the dark veins of her mother

Forcing to let her taste

Her own dark fear and pain

But out of breath-

She sees another child

ache

dreaming of

one breeze

sucking the shingle

and three birds

in a wide sky

And she believes

No matter how stars bend all their voices

Or how these stones silently cry

But her eyes have permitted every colour

After the first death, there is no other…

No, there shall be, no other…

red_lice

102605

of days gone

The days

are blissful

in repose

or supposed to be.

The wind

blows in sadness

as rumours

kill the peace.

The stars
are dimly bright

refracting

the reluctant fire;

the unbearable sound

of her muted children’s cry

cracking the hole in the sky

the moon with its rusty ring-

slowly fading away

[empty]

“Nobody seems very hungry

Nobody seems to care

Nobody saw the god in himself

Quietly standing there”

The torn sky

watches in silence

weeping.

The rain

untouched by magic

or economic stress

just dreams-

of the wide blue sea.

Oh, today

yes, today

is blissful

in repose

or supposed to be.

07/01/2006

r_L

Our World

*special thanks to Allan for the permission*
Our World
by Allan (admin Woodlander)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In our world,


We live in harmony with nature knowing we and she are one


We work together as one to meet the needs of all


We love the practical, the intellectual, the cultural and the spiritual


We endeavour at all times to take less than we give


We love our world and take care to protect her at all times and by law


We gain satisfaction from being actively involved in selfless endeavour


We care for and look after each other when help is needed


We ensure education is available to all


We ensure health care is available to all


We ensure a safe, secure home is available to all


We believe in being all you can be, not having all you can take


We work always to reduce the negative impact of humanity on our world


We feel a full and loving fellowship with all living beings


We uphold honesty, decency and justice at all levels


We share our world’s resources so all can have access to a full life


We take care not to encroach on the biosphere of other living things


We work together to ensure no child dies needlessly from any cause


We control our desires so that others may live


This could have been,


Our World

www.allanspalace.com

I've just browsed my favourite haven, http://allanspalace.com/ It's a place where I could read and share great poems or thoughts with people around the world. Beautiful people with brilliant minds. Huhu, well I've been thinking of creating my own page one day, where everyone (especially my poet friends) could gather around sometime. Well, not that I can't have one now, it's just that I have lotsa other things to be done at the moment. You know, first things first. But maybe, I will still have that done one day..( God willing) Y'know when I have all time in the world and be around terrific people in my life. Who knows? But well, it's almost seeming impossible with what I've just chosen as a career of my life right now. Hmm. (Yea, that's gonna take me years, yes years) Haha, now now, let's put an end to it. Well, I'm just saying that that site is amazing.

So please, take your time as you wander about the place. Though you may not really enjoy poetry, just look around. Who knows, you may find something useful eh? And if you're interested, just become a member and write away!

r_L