Thursday, June 28, 2007

Au revoir~

I’m not going to say anything much in this post. Just some farewell and a few more words before my college reopens. Though I’ve done a lot of fretting about my boredom throughout this vacation, I’m not so crazy about going back to college either. Sigh.

Anyway, like it or not, I’ve already started sorting out and buying stuff… so as the packing, unpacking, and repacking. I never realized how ice cold my brain had been until I dusted off the books and skimmed through whatever data they have inside. Yeah sure, it all came back smoothly and brightly. Heck. You kidding me? It felt like I just read them for the first time. Meaning, zero memory capacity. Pfft.

Now don’t give me this I-told-you-so look. I could sense it coming from your breathy laugh, alright. Apart from my not feeling so great now, I’m still crazy about listing things. Especially when I’m not feeling at my best. Catalogues help, too. Although many see them as paper wastes, others still pick them up and browse through the 6 pages with real interest. Some might even get carried away and too trusting that they easily fall for whatever 2 for 1 or crazy discounts offered; only to leave behind some grocery bags (with freebies, coupons, etc in it) around the mall. Talk about a nice shopping spree. Alright. I’m one of those people.

Well, I had some enjoyable time doing those jigsaw puzzles lately. But the joy didn’t last for long since I couldn’t stand completing them at one sitting. Alas, Mza didn’t want to play with me anymore because it seemed to her that I had a hard time structuring the border and that didn’t really help the whole picture. Okay, so she did most of the puzzle. I rest my case. She was amazing. I sucked, totally. Haha. And that wasn’t the only time though. I actually gave up origami long ago because I find it impossible, really. Things I thought I could be pretty good at turn out to be my worst encounters. It occurs to me that I can do possibly nothing. Even my walking around the house in my flowery pants seems to be a fashion crime these days.

How can what feels so right be wrong?

Nonetheless, it was what I hoped to achieve on my vacation. I was looking for a challenge; which I realized that entertaining boredom itself was far more worth a challenge. I was looking to reunite with dear friends; just to know how everyone else was doing. I was looking for a place to get a star tan; that is the nights are so bright here sometimes you can see a night rainbow. It’s right here, at home. I was just looking for some more of me and to remove some unwanted bits as well. Not to be separate, but to dissolve some worries and get a lot closer to the oneness that one needs to have Love. I came to savour my peppermint ice cream alone, merrily. And learn that Life is but a dream.


We live in interesting times.
I am 7049 days old as of today.
God, I feel awesome.

See you soon freaks,
r_L

2 comments:

HRH Fiza said...

this blog is deadddd.
deadd i tell youuuuuuuuu.
hehe

rajanurhazirah said...

haha. yes..yes. you said it loud and clear ay. aish. nta la mak incik. tatau la ble saye mau tulis lg.hee.